Confessions of an 18-month old

The past month has been a whirlwind. Since I had Mia, life has been like a crazy scene from the old movie Three Men and a Baby, only in this case its Two Babies and One Mommy! Every ‘scene’ I envisioned happening has already happened, and new ones are surfacing daily. Here’s a replay of my entire day last Wednesday.

6:00am NEXT DOOR DOG STARTS BARKING

6:30am Cristian wakes up bright and early and calls out ‘mommy’ thirty consecutive times before I actually go get him.

7:00am Mini Mia also wakes up with her mouth wide open and her head bobbing left to right looking for her morning snack – my boob.

7:15am I am sitting on the couch feeding Mia while Cristian is yanking my leg calling out “Baaynee” (Barney).

7:30-9:00am Cristian is in and out playing with Asuzena while I settle Mia down for her morning nap.

10:00am I notice Cristian looking a bit tired, only to find out he has a fever.

12:00pm I put Cristian down for a nap right after I give him a shot of Tempra.

1:00pm Cristian wakes up and yaks all over the place (Mia’s still sleeping people!)

1:15pm I call Asuzena to come back and care for Mia while I rush Cristian to the pediatrician as he’s burning up with a near 40 temperature.

3:00pm We arrive home after finding out C has another throat infection.

3:30pm Asuzena leaves again and the chaos continues……

4:00pm-5:00pm Mia wakes up hungry, Cristian is crying and having a tantrum, Mia needs mommy to feed her, Cristian needs mommy to comfort him, and mommy needs a good shot of something strong by the time daddy gets home!

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In the evening, Vince stepped out to talk to the neighbors about their dog’s constant barking. Yes folks, it’s still an issue! During this time, I finally put both kids to sleep and was carrying Cristian to bed…WHEN…he suddenly woke up crying and started throwing up all over me from the family room all the way to the front door. I sood at the door helplessly calling out Vince’s name hoping he was outside. I was covered in vomit – literally from head to toe – at which time, mini Mia woke up from all the commotion. There I was hoping my knight in shining armor was around the corner. And sure enough, he was.

It’s been great. Truly it has, but definitely a challenge raising two babies at once with no family to help out. The way I put it - sometimes I feel like I am trying to 'drive two cars at the same time.' And obviously, it's just not possible.

I had my leg surgery a few weeks back, and last week was the first time I was actually able to drive. So, I decided to take Cristian and Mia out to visit my friend Chin and her kids. It had been a while since Cristian had gone out. As we left the house, I made a turn onto the main boulevard…here’s how the conversation went:

Me: “Here’s your juice Cristian.”

Mia: “Waa”

Cristian: “Tantoo Mommy” (Translation: Thank You Mommy)

…continue driving…silence in the car……

Cristian: “Mommy”

Me: “Yes Cristian”

Cristian: “Fun!”

And we were only at the first set of lights past our house!

Here's To Our New Addition!

Mia Maryann Perri Degirmencioglu

Born Monday March 19th 2007 @ 1:58pm

CIMA Hospital

Hermosillo, Sonora Mexico

5.8Lbs

20 inches

What Would You Do?

I have 6 days left. My C section is scheduled for the 22nd of March (this Thursday). Hopefully I'll make it till then. According to my doctor, he thinks I may deliver sooner than that. There’s a feisty child in there making it known that space is limited. At times, I feel like a foot is about to pop out of my mouth. I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Nella, Rich and Vito were here for a week. They’re heading back up to the great white north Friday. My sister will be arriving Saturday and soon after my mom will also make her way down. So exciting! All the visits from our loved ones is a simple reminder that our big day is nearing. We will no longer be just a family of three!

I’m physically ready to have this baby. Emotionally, I’m not so sure. I am panicked – a bit – actually – a lot. Many scenarios are going through my head to which I’m having a hard time coming up with solutions.

Scenario #1
I finally fall asleep. Baby wakes up crying for his/her feeding. C decides he wants to get up also. A symphony of ‘waa’ and ‘mami’ is going off in the house.

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Scenario #2
I am sitting on my chair breastfeeding baby. C is playing and notices baby sucking on my boob. As memories start going through his head, he becomes nostalgic and decides he wants a little nibble too.

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Scenario #3
I am home alone tending to both my babies when C decides he also wants to be carried around in the baby Bjorn (after all, it was his first.)

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WHAT DO I DO?

Side by Side or Front to Back

I’ve always thought from behind is better. Much more comfortable with easier access, sideways just looks awkward. I don’t think I could handle the width. Though I’ve never actually tried it, it looks harder to manage and maneuver.

I’m talking about strollers – that is!

So, now that we have baby #2 only weeks away from joining our crazy clan, we’re considering purchasing a double stroller. I never thought I would actually be using one of those, but with a newborn baby and a tiny man who’ll only be a year-and-a-half old next month – I’m seriously considering it.

Double Stroller vs. Local Mall Stores

I’ve gone online and shopped around. However, before I continue, I must decide which is better.

A) Having my kids sitting side by side – sharing snacks, toys and entertaining each other. (Possibly followed by hair pulling and screaming matches?!)

B) Having my kids sitting front to back – unable to share toys, snacks, hair pulling and allowing their mom easy access to shopping malls and her favorite shoe stores without knocking over displays etc…

I think I know the answer…..but audience – I need your help.
I’ve decided to use a ‘life-line’ for this matter….what's your opinion or advice?

Dealin' Wit Da Bomba*Blood*Clot

Im stubborn. We all think we are invincible to some degree. But we’re really not. Things happen in life and sometimes the easiest way out is to blame ourselves for the outcome.

That’s my position right now.

November is when I found out I had a problem with the circulation in my right leg. Insufficient Venous is what they called it. The pressure of the baby is what caused my leg to feel the need to keep blood in one place and not pump it back to where it should be going – a minor setback which has turned into something far more serious.

December came around, and of course, our ever so busy travel schedule begun. We flew to and from Toronto. Then, we headed off to Cancun to celebrate New Year’s, just the three of us, before baby #2 comes along. It was fun. We had a blast. But the consequences have made me question my judgment given my situation. I was told by my doctors it would be ok to fly, just as long as I wore my ‘super-sexy-granny-stocking’ on the plane rides, and took an herbal vitamin that would assist in circulating blood flow in my leg. Well, clearly that failed....

Upon our return home is when we discovered I had developed a blood clot. Superficial Thrombosis. I was devastated. Just hearing those words had me hating myself for not taking matters more seriously. After a weekend of crying and feeling sorry for myself, I did what any of us would do – yet shouldn’t. I went online to research my condition. And, sure enough, the words ‘Blood clots are the leading cause of death among pregnant women’ popped up right before my very eyes. Oh my God! I COUD DIE! That’s all I kept thinking. Ok, I know some of you are thinking “There she goes, Miss Melodrama!” But FOR REAL. Aneurism. Stroke. All these words were flashing brightly in my head. Not cool.

After many visits with several doctors and specialists, I have been reassured that my case is under control and not as serious as I once thought. Again….not AS serious…but serious enough that I have to be injected daily with something called Clexane (a blood thinner) to prevent the clot from getting bigger and traveling elsewhere.

At this point….I am 35 weeks preggo and the baby (believe it or not) is doing just fine. Apparently, Thrombosis is more dangerous to the mother than it is to the baby. Great…so it’s alright that I die and my child survive without a mother?? (Violins in the background please, let the music begin.) Oh the drama!

Ok. Ok. Really. Things are great…..and I will be just fine. Just have to repeat that to myself over and over….cause the mere thought of anything worse happening just breaks my heart every time I look at Cristian. I can’t even imagine it. UGH.

Happy thoughts…Happy thoughts!

My C-section is scheduled for March 22 (my mom’s birthday!)…and I’m counting down the seconds...hours….days…weeks...to meet my little…….oops, I almost slipped!

Can’t wait!!!

Us at Revival watching V's cousin Danny perform with his band The Sea Inside.

A great night out with the gang!

Joe Joe....we miss you tons already!!

Vince and I...a much deserved night out together...sans-bebe!

Christmas Eve at V's parents house!!

Four generations under one roof...Nonna Lisa, Great Nonna Catarine, Great Great Nonna Betina and of course mini - Cristian!

On Friday December 15th, my beloved sista and my littlest Li threw a mini baby shower in my honour along with some of my closest friends!

Our annual Girls Kris Kringle Gift exchange was hosted by my friend Cathy this year...GO CATH for your feature drinks and star fruit garnishings!

"Ho...Ho..Ho?"

NO! NO! NO!

Today was Cristian’s big day – a day when he finally got to sit on Santa’s merry lap and share his Christmas cheer. My little guy was all decked out looking more adorable than ever, eager to have his picture with the big man!


We arrived at the mall around noon. It’s safe to say it was chaos. Luckily, the line to see Santa wasn’t nearly as long as I thought it would be. After 20 minutes of waiting, our turn finally came up. I eagerly carried him up into Santa’s ‘makeshift’ home. Vince by my side, we were anxious to see how Cristian would react. Well, one LOOK at Santa...and our questions were answered. He calmly turned his head the other way and began reciting …."No! No! No! Out! Out! Out!"

After a few failed attempts, Santa finally insisted I sit on his lap and hold Cristian in my arms. I was hoping Vince would join the picture...much to my dismay, he declined the offer.

Have a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!! And a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

P.S. Notice his finger (right hand) is pointing towards the exit door!

City of The Children

Their flight may begin as far south as Acapulco. As they group themselves with other maltreated and abandoned children, they begin their journey north to find a better life elsewhere.

Many orphans in Mexico have been found by the police living abandoned to fend for themselves. Still others make their way from families who can no longer care for them. Since there is no "public assistance" in Mexico, struggling single mothers end up abandoning their children to an orphanage out of necessity. Although it is terribly sad, it is done as an act of love. Poverty makes me sad. Homelessness makes me sad. Child abandonment makes me even sadder.

Approximately 2 million Mexican children are orphaned or abandoned.

Forty years ago, a young man named Josue Lopez was moved by the plight of the multitudes of homeless children foraging for survival in the streets of his city, Juarez, Mexico. Like the Good Samaritan, Josue could not just look away and go on about his business. He was determined to do something to help these children who had no one to love and care for them. Similar to a project Josue started in Juarez, here in Hermosillo, we connected with a project called "Ciudad de Los Niños" (City of the Children). This project started in 1982 with one small house (casita). Today there are 4 projects in the works and several others on the drawing board. Ciudad de Los Niños is designed as a village for children, whose ages range from 1 to 13 years of age. With a donation of 5 acres of land from the government, and with help from local volunteers and many community organizations, this village for children now has 22 casitas, a library, a medical clinic, a facility for children with special needs, a church and a mini police station!

Ciudad de Los Niños is run almost entirely by volunteers, and is the biggest project of its kind in the state of Sonora. Each casita houses 6 to 8 children and a house mother. Currently, there are a total of 56 children living there. These children come from abused, abandoned or homeless backgrounds. This village setting gives the children a chance to experience more of a normal life than they might have been able to than if they were in a more institutional setting. The children are healing, yet they still need lots of love, affection and of course, attention.

I really wanted to do something for these kids this holiday season, so, I volunteered to be part of a committee to help throw them a Christmas party and collect gifts. Vince was kind enough to make a donation on behalf of his company, and purchase their first ever, very own Christmas tree - with all the trimmings!

Upon our arrival at the orphanage (on Friday December 8^th), the children greeted us with much anticipation and love. They were eager to help decorate the tree and willing to wait patiently for the festivities to begin. There was music, arts & crafts and a trampoline. Seeing the excitement on their faces is a vision that will be embedded in my mind for a lifetime.

I did feel sad. Having my own child (and another one on the way) I can’t ever imagine abandoning or mistreating my babies. As I looked at the children there, I felt the pain they must feel when they wake up each morning, sleeping next to another child who has also been forgotten and left behind.

When the party was over, the coordinator at the orphanage was kind enough to take me inside one of the casitas where the children live. I walked into a quaint little living room with a set of couches, a TV, and adornments on the wall. The further in I went, the more visible it became. It was depressing. Everything was old and extremely worn. The bathroom door had a giant hole I could crawl through, the toilet seat was falling apart and the shower looked like it was outside. What I realized is, what matters most is the children are happy (on the outside anyway) and look like they are well cared for, considering the circumstances. With the conditions they must have lived in before, I am sure this is by far a safer haven than they could have ever imagined.

On my drive home I couldn’t help but think about my experience. I think we all need to take a step back once in a while and really evaluate our lives and value all that we have. And, I don’t just mean the ‘material’ part of it. What I mean is, we must value our families. We must value those around us and appreciate how lucky we are to be loved. Because, even if it’s only one person we can really…I MEAN REALLY…count on…..it’s one more person than these children had before they arrived to the orphanage.

‘Tis the season…..however, in reality, all year must be a time to remember the less fortunate - and help make a difference in their lives. All year must be a time to give thanks for what we have and be grateful for the loved ones around us…

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Perfect. It's Just Perfect. Or Not.

I’m a mom on the verge of a mild mommy breakdown. Ok, fine, 'breakdown' is too harsh a word. I’m a mommy in need of advice.

My baby bear turned one in September and we celebrated this ever so festive occasion by throwing him an authentic Mexican Fiesta outdoors in Toronto (in early October – imagine how ‘tropical’ we felt when a sudden downpour of rain and a cold gust of wind happened to pass by that very afternoon). The party was a success and my little man was totally adorable in his Mexican serape and miniature sombrero. We spent 3 weeks in Toronto, and I couldn’t wait to come back to Hermosillo. Don’t get me wrong, I love being with everyone up north, but I guess having been raising my son away from everyone and doing my ‘own things’ with him has led me to be an independent mom who doesn’t necessarily need much help – nor advice – from others. Nor, do I need constant badgering of who he looks like – or insistence on who he doesn’t look like - all irrelevant and very annoying.

Now that most of my friends are becoming parents, it’s safe to say we are able to share stories and compare anecdotes about this newfound journey called ‘motherhood’. Though we are blessed, it sure comes with certain outside pressures that were never thought of before. The pressure to be a perfect parent, make perfect decisions and always be a perfect role model for our off springs. Well, it ain’t possible to be perfect all the time – especially when there are other elements involved – ie. lack of sleep, cranky baby, dogs bark waking up the entire family, house alarm going off during nap times, the list can go on and on. One thing’s for sure, as far as our little one’s are concerned – MOMMY is always perfect…and MOMMY is always right!

Our new house has been great. The set up is indeed perfect for little C to play and walk around in. So long are the days with me chasing Cristian up and down a thousand marble steps. Again. I can’t say it’s been ‘perfect’……the infestation of termites we had last month definitely plays a role in my opinion. Not a big deal really, I’d much rather have these little critters running around – or, rather ‘eating around’ than the big fat cucarachas that were part of our family in the other house. The fumigation took place a few weeks back and we’re good for another year. Now, the part I need the most advice on. This problem being solved would indeed help make things close to perfect! What do you do, when you have a neighbor living next door with the world’s most annoying dog constantly barking at your son’s window, waking him up from his peaceful sleeps? Well, as a mother, a nice shot of tequila seems to be the only answer (to calm thy nerves), however, given my current physical state of ‘pregnant-ness’ that’s not possible. So we’ve spoken to our wretched neighbors several times – to no avail. I’m on the verge of a breakdown. Every time I hear that dogs loud, squeaky yelp, my blood boils to new levels and I can’t help to feel the urge to a) go outside and pepper spray the shit out of the small French poodle b) run him over with my car (ouch – yes – cruel), or c) throw over some tacos à-la-laxative (to teach him a really shitty lesson). Whatever the solution may be, we need to think of it sooner rather than later. With baby #2 on the way, I can’t imagine waking up to a symphony every morning…. “(Dog) Wooff Woof, (baby) waaa waaa, (Cristian) mama mama… dog) Wooff Woof, (baby) waaa waaa, (Cristian) mama mama…” SUICIDE!

Aside from that, things have been great. I’ve been attending yoga classes four times a week, and am officially in charge of publishing a monthly newsletter for the ESIA Committee (group of foreign ladies mostly from the American embassy with monthly events and a variety of organized activities.) I am also part of a committee organizing a Christmas party for the local orphanage called Casa De Los Niños. The party will be held December 8th. I am really excited to be able to share the Christmas cheer with children who are without ‘family’ – at a time when family matters most – living in constant wonder of what will become of their fate. It will definitely be an emotionally rewarding experience.

Cristian’s been getting bigger and bigger by the day. He started walking earlier this month and his vocabulary is broadening by the minute. Some of his words include: agua, tamales, adios…oh, and his favourite word – assho! Don’t ask. Just picture us walking down the aisles at the grocery store, as Cristian blurts out “Assho” to every Juan, Jose and Fernanda that walks by. Thank goodness not everyone speaks or understands English here. Funny? SO NOT funny! But cute? I'll give it that.

As for me. I am feeling great and am currently in my 21st week of pregnancy. Aside from the nasty blue veins popping out of my right leg, all’s been well. (Yes ladies, I recently developed a nasty case of varicose veins – thanks to baby #2) Sucks. Oh well, what can I do – but raise my legs on a pillow and wear granny thigh-high stockings. Gosh, how unattractive – I wish they would at least make those things in a nice shade of midnight balck – or ‘fish net’ would be an even better option. Talk about ruining an ‘already getting fat & feeling unsexy’ pregnant woman’s ego. Ladies, any advice on this matter would be much appreciated also.

And that’s my story. It’s been a while, I know, I suck. I’m only a perfect mom (wink wink)….I can’t be perfect at everything…..

And Baby Makes...

Four!

We had no satellite for a month – which means no TV, nothing to do but ‘snuggle’ *wink* *wink* (no wonder why in the old ages, sans electricity, families had more children than they could keep track of). We traveled to several fun spots on our road trip, and had an amazing vacation for two additional weeks by the ocean. Upon our return to Hermosillo is when I learned….we’re having another baby! Viva Mexico! Viva Mexico! I guess it’s something in the water? The quesadillas? The coyotas? Whatever it is, we are totally thrilled. And so the fun begins, yet again. Now that Cristian is crawling, climbing and communicating in such a way that constantly makes me want to take a bite out of his cheeks – I am confident that baby #2 will also be a blast. Cristian will be a big brother and I will be a mother of two.
WHAT THE F!#%?

So, with this comes a whole new chapter of ‘change’. We’re moving again. No, not back to Toronto (thank God for that, not sure if I’m ready to come back just yet – that’s a whole other entry I will write about soon.) Rather, we are moving to another house 15 minutes away from where we currently are. It’s a beautiful area surrounded by mountains. The new house is all on one floor – which means chasing Cristian up and down marble steps will be a thing of the past - has a gorgeous pool, a Jacuzzi, a workout room and a billiard room with a big screen TV.
And so the packing has begun! I can’t even begin to tell you the amount of unnecessary junk that has compiled in our house in just over two years.

I’m excited. Although nervous about the change, I know it will be nice.

I feel like I’m a pro by now. I’ve mastered the art of:

- Moving away from home
- Making a whole new group of friends from around the world
- Learning an entire new language
- Raising my first child away from what used to be familiar

….and now, I will be changing homes and carrying my SECOND child – but this time it's all in MY 'familiar' surroundings!

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It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, and embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.